Diurnata

On a journey onwards and upwards …

Does Dwynwen need a slap?

So today is Dydd Santes Dwynwen or maybe Diwrnod Santes Dwynwen … the Welsh equivalent of St Valentines Day. I seem to have spent much of it being slightly cross. Partly due to a stressful time at work, partly because I’m fighting the urge to scream every time I see people declaring their love and being all happy and cosy and stuff. Being recently separated makes me want to slap everyone who looks loved up. To be fair I’m happy that people are happy and it’s lovely … but … you know. Our separation was a calm and mutual decision and we’re both doing fine, but of course I mourn long ago days, and it can be lonely. So there you go. This is me right now. Sent a bit do-lally by an excess of meetings and wanting to slap people. And most likely spilling too much information in public places.

Don’t worry I haven’t actually committed any acts of violence, and I don’t plan for that to change. It’s just in my head!

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Looking Back & Looking Forward

For the last few days I’ve been spending time at my parents house for Christmas. They still live in my childhood home so me and the kids share my old bedroom when we’re staying. So here I am back home, in my old bedroom, looking out at the same view (more or less) as I looked out at while working on homework 20 odd years ago. Not quite the same person as I was, but an older, wiser version of myself. Life has changed and is continuing to change at the moment. 2011 was not the best year. Hopefully 2012 will be better – things will get sorted out and we’ll get used to the new normal. As the year changes I’m trying not to look back but to look forward at what is to come. I aim to make this a new start in many ways – this is the beginning of a new stage in my life.

I have some New Year’s Resolutions:

  • Don’t dwell on the past – look forward to the future
  • Be positive – concentrate on the good stuff not the bad
  • Be grateful – be thankful for what I have
  • Try & find a way to allow myself some regular child-free non-work time to do something just for me
  • Learn how to do some basic DIY
  • Eat more healthily & do a bit of exercise

Happy New Year to all reading this. Hope 2012 is a good year for you :-)

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Sunset.

Sunset. Caught the sunset today – happened to be driving home as the sun was going down and diverted to the seafront to see if I could get a photo. Abi was very patient with me while I took a load of pictures as the sun sank down. Photos never look quite as good as the real thing I think, but maybe that's down to my lack of talent, or the fact that I don't have a fancy pants camera. Couldn't decide on one being the best so I uploaded all my favourites. Took me forever as my internet seems to be slow as a snail tonight for some reason. Anyway, hope you enjoy these Aberystwyth sunset photos :) .

#wp

Sunsets (14 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/DQevKDza4X5

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We will remember them

I will remember them. But I will not glorify war.

If you haven’t read the poems of Wilfred Owen you can download a copy of Poems by Wilfred Owen as part of Project Gutenberg. His poetry allows you to see World War 1 through the eyes of someone who was really there. It allows you to see the reality of war, the terrible awfulness of it.

I choose peace.

Anthem for Doomed Youth

What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?
Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles’ rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries for them; no prayers nor bells,
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs, –
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys, but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes.
The pallor of girls’ brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.

Dulce et Decorum est

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs,
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep.  Many had lost their boots,
But limped on, blood-shod.  All went lame, all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.

Gas!  GAS!  Quick, boys! —  An ecstasy of fumbling
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime. –
Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams before my helpless sight
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin,
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs
Bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues, –
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie:  Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

Wilfred Owen.

18th March 1893 – 4th November 1918

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Christmas is Coming.

Christmas is Coming. I was getting stressed out by the thought of Christmas and feeling panicky whenever I contemplated it. A lot of things are changing in my life and Christmas is going to be quite different, and the time seems to be flying by so fast. It's a bit overwhelming. However, today I was in Morrisons and had a peek in the Christmas aisle. I bought some bits and bobs for stockings, half a Christmas present, Christmas cards and wrapping paper. This has made Christmas seem less scary. Still lots to do, lots to decide, lots to buy, but I feel better to have started. And I love the colour of the cards and wrap – just what I was looking for :)
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Random (15 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/FMEAtHwLJjP

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Ripples

Ripple effect on water

Everything we do,
Everything we say,
Everything we don’t do,
Everything we don’t say.

Cause and effect,
Cause and effect, effect, effect,
Rippling outwards
Wave upon wave.

Each decision,
Each choice,
Bad or good, easy or hard,
Big or small, wrong or right.

If onlys and I wishes,
No going back, no regrets.
Just watch as the ripples spread wide
And ride out the waves.

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Daisy.

Daisy. Today's rather belated photo is this cropped version of a photo I took of a daisy the other day. Today I am too tired and too 'meh' to take photos. I cropped this photo partly because the petals at the top were a bit straggly and torn, and partly because I was reading somewhere about thirds and magic rectangles or whatever they are … I'm not really sure if this is a good crop or a stupid crop, or whether I have the thirds right or anything. Anyway, I like it, so that's the main thing. I shall try not to be so 'meh' tomorrow.
#wp

Random (14 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/JEfCJqEqJ9q

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Bluebottle.

Bluebottle. Today's photo is this bluebottle fly I photographed yesterday. I'm not a fan of flies, but they're actually really pretty when you get close. The sun caught the blue-green colour on this one beautifully. For some reason there was quite a gathering of bluebottles on the garden shed.

I'm really enjoying macro photography. I'm clearly not a "proper" photographer but my camera has a really good super macro setting which is why these pictures are coming out well. I don't find it easy to get a good landscape shot, but these close ups are different. I'm wondering if one day I might look into "proper" photography and try and learn about lenses and stuff – right now I haven't a clue.

Meanwhile, I might try and take a few bird photos if I can tempt them to my garden with some fat balls … we shall see.

#wp

Random (13 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/bfs5CkBW59c

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Fireworks.

The kids and I had some fun with some fountain fireworks and sparklers tonight :-) Ben took the photos of the fountains while I was busy lighting them. Then I took photos of him and Abi with the sparklers. I was experimenting with the settings on my camera so some of the sparkler photos are different – nice to actually see the children’s faces in some of them! Happy Fireworks Night / Bonfire Night / Guy Fawkes … whatever you want to call it!
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Fireworks Night 2011 (18 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/8f8d7mrgzsc

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Hairy Beastie.

Hairy Beastie. It surprises me how hairy insects are when you get up close, and actually how pretty they can be. This one very helpfully landed on the little willow tree and calmly sat there for a while and allowed me to poke the camera right at it! I'm not sure exactly what sort of flying thing he is – I'm assuming he's a Hoverfly. I might post another zoomed in version of this pic so you can see the hairs.

#wp

Random (11 photos)

from Suzy Shipman – Google+ User output https://plus.google.com/102182996873093042821/posts/7vTf4ZnSdpe

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